Wednesday 29 September 2010

Some questions ...

What do you do when the people looking after your diabetic child won't take juice with them to the park?
What do you do when they also won't take their mobile phone?
What do you do if you leave these people with your child to go to work for four hours, leaving lunch ready to heat and a snack for mid-morning too, only to call at 2pm to hear that your child has been allowed to sleep through the morning snack time and through lunch and has been left on the sofa sleeping until your call?
What do you do if one of them likes to play so wildly and madly with your child that they go hypo EVERY SINGLE TIME they see him?
What do you do if you had tried for more than a year to explain this issue to them and they do not change their behaviour at all?
What do you do if people you see regularly refuse to hear your words and refuse to take your stress and needs as well as those of your child into account?

And, what do you do if those people above, in every instance, are your own parents?
Back soon with the answers I have found and with the crafts as promised.
Just needed that off my chest after a sleepless night over it all.


  1. Tricky one - I have to say that at times I have had to be downright blunt with some people, saying that without the right care, my child could die. Harsh I know but as you say how else do you get the message across. Hope the situation resolves itself soon and am interested to hear the answers you have found.
    PS not stalking you either - lunchtime here!

  2. Well, I am stalking her!!! LOL.

    Tough one. You may have to lay it out that if they don't keep Frank's safety in mind that you may need to find other care options for him. Yes, I know they are family and I don't know what other child-care options you have if any...but Frank's wellbeing depends on them getting it. Can you bring them to your next Endo appt? and have your Endo explain it to them so they are hearing it from someone other than you? Just a thought.

    I'll look forward to your answers. and crafts!

  3. Oh dear.

    Our CDE suggested that the grandparents take a training course if at all possible. Is there a local CDE or organization that has training? The Children With Diabetes Friends for Life has a grandparents track.

    Maybe if it is coming from someone other than you they will listen.

    Can you write out a checklist with times and to-do items and make them check them off each time?

    So tough. Good luck.

  4. I agree with all of the above comments. When it comes down to it I think I would tell them it is a matter of life and's sounds quite dramatic but in a "worst case scenario", it's the truth :(

    Unfortunately, our kids are living with a disease that can turn very dangerous in a short period of time. I'm so sorry you are struggling with this, my best wishes for you and for your son!

    Good luck (((hugs)))

  5. Oh man, I am so sorry you have to deal with this. My dad is not close enough to care for the kid on a regular basis, so we haven't encountered this challenge, but it sounds so difficult. I would take the advice above to heart. Glad you were able to get it off your chest and hope you felt better afterward.

  6. They must not "want" him to have diabetes?! So they just pretend he doesn't have it? I don't understand some people either. But I can say that I got a call from the pre-school on Wednesday. Ellie's Dexcom was reading 145 with an arrow down. They got the information sheet out that I gave them and they called as I have listed...I told them to have her test herself and then follow the sheet based on the number...I get a call back 10 minutes later...It's 88! The sheet says to give her juice and then call you! Do you want us to give her juice?! OMG!!! REALLY!? SPECIFICALLY IT SAYS TO GIVE HER JUICE FIRST! The pre-school teacher read it to me for petes-sake! Ha! Now 88 isn't an emergency...but thankfully it wasn't 34 or something? These are very aware, caring people who are always watching her numbers and ready for action. When it comes down to it though, people just aren't going to truly get it I don't think. All is well and I wasn't that upset at the time. They did call and she was ok, but it was a big wake up call for me regarding the D and outside care. I'm sorry your parents haven't taken good steps to help you and your little boy. Nothing could be more upsetting than wondering if he's going to be ok while you are away. ((hugs))

  7. I meant to comment when you wrote this, but didn't.
    Frank can't stay with them any more. It's simple. If it was anyone else, you wouldn't leave Frank with them.
    I like the suggestion to have them meet with a CDE.
    I'm sorry you've had to leave your job for now.

  8. Man, that is a tough one! They obviously don't know how serious D can be. I read you already came up with some great conclusions, but the truth is, they just don't get it yet. They have NO IDEA how dangerous their actions were. They couldn't. Becuase if they did, they wouldn't have done it. Unfortunatly you can't tie them up and MAKE them get it. :( A good heart to heart? Sounds like you have already given that a try. I am of no help. But I feel your pain friend. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. It is heartbreaking, I know!

  9. Oh Jules,
    I feel your distress about it all. Maybe if your parents went with you to a doctor appt and the doctor talked with them? Who has influence on them? My parents are older - 83 and 84 and want no part in taking care of Grace. I feel where you are coming from. Hugs, Penny

  10. Oh, man....I've dealt with this too....

    BUT it's only on occasion and not for very long.

    Last year, my dad decided it would just be easier not to feed her....for 8 hours....

    Just this past weekend, he thought insulin was optional.

    It's been FIVE years.